Sunday, 31 December 2006

New Year Ramble

So it's New Years Eve today. Everyone else I know is busy getting themselves ready to hit the streets and party like there's a liquor shortage! Me, on the other hand, will be pouring said liquor for said punters. Yep. I'm working on New Years Eve. No new years kissage for this old bird. Just work, work, work.

But working comes with its rewards.
For example.

the other night at the pub, I was relegated the job of wedging the lemons and limes. So while i'm playing with slippery fruit and a rather sharp chef's knife, I spaced and began working on a story i've started to write. I was able to plot out a sub plot, rewrite scenes etc. It was productive.

I was also able to do a little bit of shopping and partying this weekend. Went out with D and got rather drunk. Some lesbian was hitting on me at the hetro Dublin CAstle. Granted, I was more interested in the Italian stud she had with her. He was yummy. Lucy came over yesterday and we hung out in Camden. Bought some more bling for my hat and a bottle of DK Be Delicious, which was on serious sale!

I stat work at 7:30pm tonight and will find my bed tomorrow around 7am. Lets hope everyone comes and parties hard, tips me extravagantly (cos the brits don't tip at all!!!!) and has a good time.

Then its back to the office from the 2nd. bleh!

Wednesday, 27 December 2006

Bring on the Egg Nog

Hello Everyone,

Boy am I lucky to be around to write this post. Xmas, was, shall I say…eventful. As any holiday celebration should be. There was turkey, wine, cheese, crackers, police, Quality Streets and Amarula. Same old, same old.

Ok, so the police aren’t usually guests to my xmassy celebrations, but these were extenuating circumstances.

See, we (P and I) were invited to Nats place for xmas lunch. We went over after twelve, armed with the turkey and vege and began the whole chopping and peeling and basing thing. Once the turkey was in the oven, we went through to the tv room to do the gift unwrapping and cheese and crackers thing.
We had just unwrapped the first gifts when suddenly, it rained chopped marrows and eggplants. Nats psycho roommate had walked into the kitchen, saw the festive preparations, freaked out and threw the vege at me through the pigeon hole. She then proceeded to throw the rest of our vege off the balcony onto the grass below. She then stormed into the tv room hurtling abuse at not only Nats, but P and myself too. Going on about how Nats didn’t ask permission etc etc.

Just for the record, Nats had arranged it with her other roommates and seeing as how psycho wasn’t talking to her, she had to have the message relayed, which it obviously wasn’t.

Anyways, she retreats to her room and we shrug, and carry on with our festivities. Psycho then storms back into the room and tries to attacks Nats. I jump up and hold her off. (she’s not that big, and I could easily take her on.) She retreats again only to come back a few minutes later while Nats is on the phone to the cops. Again, I fend the psychotic loon off. Nats seems to be having a hard time on the phone with the cops, so I take the phone and with a few short words, gets the desk sergeant to agree to send over a patrol car. We then beat a hasty tactical retreat to my flat, turkey still intact and in tow.

We’re about to settle down when psycho starts beating the door and carrying o about the phone, which was missing. We didn’t know a thing about it, she obviously threw it out with our vege.

So she’s going off when suddenly the main door bell rings. P, in a bit of a state turns to me and says ‘It’s Denise.’

Denise? Who the fuck is Denise?

I took the intercom – It’s the Police!!

I let them in and they caught Psycho at the door. The one male officer took her into her flat and had serious words with her, while the female officer came into our flat and spoke to Nats.

They were obviously not happy to be called out, but I would rather the cops sorted her out than me throwing her down the two flights of stairs.

Anyways, we chilled, had the turkey, watched xmassy movies and Nats stayed the night. She snuck home this morning to collect her things for work then left.

P and I are currently having a historical action movie fest with Braveheart, Robin Hood and a few others lined up.

Bring on the port.

Friday, 22 December 2006

Its a misty xmas.

Hi everyone,

As you know, I'm a huge music fan. I especially love it when bands make an effort to be funny, sharp, and self deprecating in thier music videos.

Fall Out Boy's new video for the first single'This ain't a scene, it's an arms race' from thier new album 'Infinity on High'. They don't take themselves seriously, which is great! The video is pure fun. You know what, here it is - judge for yourself. Theh ending has a great pay off!!


Thursday, 21 December 2006

Wet Pants

You gotta love living with a guy. Take yesterday for example. I called P knowing that he'll only rise at about 9am (joys of being a waiter) and reminded him of teh pile of laundry that he said he'd do. Apparently he did the laundry, cos by the time I dragged my exhausted carcass home, the pile was gone from the middle of the living room floor - don't ask.

I promptly passed out in bed (it was only 9pm). At about 12:30am, I was awoken by P and his cousin coming home. Have never met said cousin and left him sleeping on my couch this morning. I have work tonight and wanted to wear my jeans, so i asked P if he had hung up the laundry. He muttered something and disappeared for a while. I went back to sleep, but woke up a little later. Turns out that P put the laundry in the washer but didn't hang it up until I reminded him when he got home. If I ha known this, I would have hung it up myself.

SO today, I threw on damp jeans, which froze solid the moment I walked out the door. And yes, I only have one pair of jeans. I wil buy more the moment I can affor to.

But that isn't the end of my night. Oh no. After waking up the second time, I couldn't fall back asleep. I blame the few pots of coffee I drank yesterday at work. I was wired from about 1am til 3am, then dozed until 6am. Crawled out at 7am and made it to work in time for our end of year meeting/debriefing etc.

Now for the past few weeks, I have been contemplating leaving my current job for anything better paying, regardless of career progress etc. My boss outlined the strategy for next year and the sheer volume of work lining up was enough to make me want to hide under my desk. Overwhelmed just isn't the word. And just as I was running through my various options, up comes this proposition. Next year sometime, he will be looking to recruit an events manager.

Dammit! Thats the carrot to my proverbial donkey. Looks like i'll be sticking around.

Loaded the new media player update. Spent yesterday drooling over the new look and the options and downloaded some xmas songs - turns out i had none. SO now i'm getting all xmassy, well, kind of. maybe its just the cold that i'm mistaking for xmas spirit. SOOOO damn cold. Global warming my ass!

Blogville is also very quiet with the ghosts of bloggers on leave. Am I too much of a geek to not blog during the festive season? yes, I have no life. and due to this i'm looking forward to work tonight.

Ok, i'm actually looking forward to seeing one of my two bosses at the pub.

I am Insano, queen of the geeks. I embrace my geekness and lesser geeks must bow before me.

Tuesday, 19 December 2006

Festive Mess

Its the week before xmas. I'm trying really hard to summon up some enthusiasm about it.

wait...

i think....

Big Whoop.

Ok. There it is. My xmas jolliness.

Last night on the way home, I scraped the last few silver coins in my purse together and decided to try something new. I went to the Devonshire Arms. On the outside, a very pleasant looking Tudor style pub. On the inside, a meeting place for the alternatively inclined. And by alternative I mean rock/goth/metal etc. I managed to afford a half pint an sat at the bar taking in the strange hominess of the place. Maybe it was because it reminded me of the Doors pub and grub at home. Only without the couches and harder looking goths. Any other person I bet would be rather nervous venturing into such a underworld portal. I wasn't. Funny, that.

Anyone planning to go to the movies this holiday? check this out first

I'll get philosophical later today. I'm only one cup of coffee down so far.

Monday, 18 December 2006

Mulled Wine

Life with P is currently getting on my nerves. In fact, by next week, I think he would have found my last nerve and fed it into his PS2 and used it to play Crash Bandicoot.
Granted its only been a week, but my fuck! I'm going to KILL him!
I guess I got spoilt living by myself, enjoying the peace and quiet and not getting woken up at ridiculous hours by certain roomies falling through the door at all hours from drinking binges after work.
I like having space for my stuff and not having to trip over his bag of clothes taking up most of my living room floor.
I like having to do only two loads of laundry a week instead of four and not running out of space to hang everything.

I miss my space. My space has been invaded. I don't like invasions. He has GOT to GO!!!

So today is a day that begs for the soundtrack by The Used. Its wet and freezing outside and very dark. I have a mountain of work and I can't seem to find the first foothold to get over it. Fuck it! I'm gonna do as much as I can, but if that isn't good enough for them, then sod it! I'm only a mechanism in the machine that is The Man. And The Man be damned! I guess the secret of advertising is to actually like what you're selling. Maybe its just me, but photographs and floorplans don't really send me into a creative spin. sigh!

I think, the root problem is - I haven't gone shopping in ages. I'm suffering retail therapy withdrawal. When I was on vaca, I splurged on some T-shirts and it felt good. I haven't done a decent bought of therapy in ages, mainly due to my money crisis. BLEH!

Moving on from a totally negative post...i need chocolate. Speaking of, try making coconut hot choc with a dash of rum. yummy!!

Mash

I'm not a big fan of dance music, or of Justin Timberlake, but I really loved this mix of the Robbie Williams Rudebox and JTs Sexy Back.

Friday, 15 December 2006

Thankless Job

I hope you all enjoyed the videos I posted. I have an entire catalogue more, so i'll rotate them when i can.

Lollipop has rewritten Jingle Bells:

Now for the first step away from the American stereotype of what Christmas SHOULD be, I propose our own carols that do not involve 'sledding in snow' or 'roasting nut over a fire'

(to the tune of jingle bells)

Everytime this year, we leave for the coast
baking in the sun, going brown like toast
Families gather round, stories they will bring
standing near a braai, they begin to sing:

Oh, jingle bells, batman smells, what a stupid rhyme
if we had a better song we'd sing it all the time
so much cheer, so much beer, so much summer fun
I'll enjoy my cocktails full of good old spiced gold rum

No snow, it's never cold, we live by the pool
dancing in the lightning storms has never felt this cool
Christmas eve, Santa's here, for the good and bad
in his neon boxer shorts he looks a bit like...Dad!

Boerewors, lamb kebabs, salads, rolls and steak
Christmas lunch is never small, dont make that sad mistake
We dont need snow and bells, our Spirits are not wrong
My Uncle got his Christmas wish, a super stylish BONG!


I remember the day she wrote it. It was a nice hot sunday and we were stuck in church, when we could have been outside swimming and chilling. hehehe.

Started my second job last night. Bartending is like riding a bike. You never forget how to do it. Just learn the lay out of the bar and pretty soon you're pouring away. I forgot how much I actually enjoyed bartending. You get to meet pretty cool people, chat up hot guys, and by definition, the bartender is the coolest person there. I just haven't learnt how to do the whole Tom Cruise in Cocktails swirling of the bottles thing yet. But give me time!

I wanted to collapse when i got home, but P and Nats had other ideas. Being the unemployed and student means that bedtime is anytime. For the overworked and exhausted, its as soon as I find my bed. I nudged Nats aside (she sat on my bed as the TV is in the bedroom), found my KLM sponsored blankie and curled up and died.

The UK has really crappy cell networks. They charge you to check your voicemail, then if you can't cos you have no airtime, they send you reminders at god awful times of the morning (read anytime of the morning). They also don't have 'Please call me's and there is no signal in my office. Inconsiderate bastards!

Tonight, being friday night, I plan to go home and die in front of season five of Buffy. I have work tomorrow, from 11am til 7pm.
And despite my copious working and sendign money home, my sister still has the audacity to send me an email crapping me out for living the jet set life over here. If she only knew.

Thursday, 14 December 2006

The Fratellis - Chelsea Dagger

End of year review

I know, every other blogger out there is doing it, and i'm not one for bandwagoning it, but what the hell...

2006 has been a rollercoaster ride from January.

Lowdown drink inducers.
Suffered severe unrequited crush (Jan - Nov)
My Tazz was stolen with irreplacable personal effects in it. (Feb)
I lost my job. (April)
Suffered bad depression (Jan - Jul)
Lost a friend in car accident (Oct)
Sucide inducing hangovers (all year)

High Times
Great friends (all year)
Great nights out with great friends (all year)
Promoting / organising music gigs (Feb)
Mutherfudd Metal Fest (Feb)
Reconnected with old friends (Feb)
Weekend trip to Cape Town (Mar)
Startimer Show (April)
Splashy Fen (April)
Moved to UK (July)
Made new friends (July)
Beat depression (Aug)
Watching Blue October live for my birthday (Sept)
My Chemical Romance Concert (Nov)
Seeing the xmas lights on Oxford str/Regent str/Camden High str. (Dec)
Overcame unrequited crush (Dec)

Wow, reading through my diary, I am able to put everything into perspective and see where I have grown as a person.
Lets hope that next year is just as eventful, or else, what would i have to blog about? I can already see some highlights on the horizon:
Skiing Trip in Feb
Splashy Fen
Lollipops 21st
Cigar's 21st
Reading/Leeds Fest
Many more concerts.

Its my flatmates b-day today, but I can't celebrate it with him as tonight I start my second job. No rest for the broke.

Wednesday, 13 December 2006

The Criminal Wave

I'm not one to get all political in general, but in a few threads i follow, the crime situation in SA has reared its ugly head, again.

I've been a victim of crime, my entire family have been victims at one time or another. My baby sister was hijacked off her bike at the age of 10, been attacked outside our home with one of her friends getting stabbed and her throat slit at the age of fourteen and is now a nervous wreck. My gran was hijacked in our driveway, Lollipop was hijacked outside her friends house, i had a smash and grab and my car was stolen from my company parking lot. And I lived in a nice area too. Not affluent, but the nicer part of middle class.

What I don't understand is why criminals are attacking children for cellphones and wallets. I can't see why you need to kill someone for thier car.

I read the Sunday Times while i was home and there was the most disturbing article in it. The journo interviewed some gangsters and they boasted about how many people they have killed, how many cars they have stolen and how they outrightly stated that they prefer being criminals to working as criminals are respected and the money is easy.
If i had to get my hands on those kids, i'd kill them!
But it doesn't help that the community respects these retrobates. These are not italian Dons. These are little hooligans running around with guns thinking they're in the latest gangster rap music video. These are not people to be respected. They need to be dealt with, swiftly.

I understand that in times of AIDS orphans and broken homes etc tht children will be looking for alternative families tht can provide, but for fucks sake, lets not send them to be raised by Fagin. Sure Oliver Twist and the Artful Dodger were cute and sang, but they were still criminals and there is nothing right about that.

So how do we solve this problem?
Harsher punishment.
There are criminals who prefer to get caught and sent to jail cos its free food, board and networking. oh, it would be a violation of thier human rights to cut off a limb as punishment. Excuse me, but the moment you threaten someone elses basic human rights, you forfeit your own. The charter does read something like - Each person has the right to live in a safe environment. Every person has the right to be treated well. No one must live under any type of threat.
We are living under numerous threats. Our rights are being ignored, blatantly. Not only by the tsotsi around the corner, but by the people who are entrusted to uphold the charter of rights.
If someone invades my home, I will practise the right to defend myself by all means, including emptying a clip into his chest. And i won't shed a tear for it, as his life was forfieted the moment he threatened mine.

Africa has always been a harsh continent, survival of the fittest etc. But, for crying out loud, if we want the international community to look at us as equals, then we should shake off the wild past. The country has been conquered long ago. The wars are over. Instead of concentrating on the past wrongs, lets work on becoming a first world nation, worthy of respect, not fear.

We don't need leaders telling our youth that its fine to steal from the white man. Its not. in fact, to steal from anyone is wrong. We need leaders that will be able to weed out the corrupt and replace them with the morally uncorrupt. I want to move back to SA without fear. I love SA, but I don't want to raise my children behind electric fencing and burgular bars. I want to be sure that when I send them to school, they won' be shot for being the wrong skin colour.

After all, isn't that what crime boils down to? Race. Yes we can argue that there are black against black crime, but in most cases, it is black against every other race crime. What are they trying to prove? Is this payback for apartheid? Sorry, I wasn't even born when it ended. Are our criminals aligning themselves as victims of the struggle just like the 15 year old Zimbabwe war "veterans"? Are they being raised with a chip on thier shoulder they don't need? And since when is laziness any excuse to commit crime.
I'm lazy. I hate getting up to go to work. But I still do it. Whats thier excuse?
No work for them? Make a plan. Start an honest business. Go work for the council, sweep the streets for crying out loud! It really is that easy.

Crime in terms of theft i can understand as there is financial gain, but crimes against people, children and animals just changes the face of criminals.
If the need for power is so strong that the only way you can see to achieve it is to overpower someone weaker than you ie women and children, then you are a coward. Read the history books, heroes, men of power and respect didn't need to rape or pillage for it, they earned it through hard work. the weak leaders felt the need for exursion.

So it all boils down to cowardice. on both parts. The criminals are cowards, hiding from work, killing on the slightest provocation, exherting "power". And we, the public are cowards for not stadning up to them. We hide behind our walls and electric fencing. We hide behind our police force instead of supporting them. we hide behind our fears and suspisions and therefore, allow the criminals to take advantage of our fear.
Yet, when we take a stand, we are punished for it. Vigilantes are prosecuted for taking the law into thier own hands. But if the hands that hold the law are sullied with the blood of innocent people, I'm afraid its the only course we can take.

Which is why i'm a big fan of vigilantes, like Spiderman, Superman, Batman etc etc. Where are our comic book heroes?

The UB40 Song

Somebody please ship me a container load of Myprodol. My brain has shrunk and every movement causes it to bang into the side of my skull.

Yep, yesterday was our end of year function with our clients. I had to arrange it all and lost a lot of sleep and hair due to it. We started the day at The Raceway indoor go karting track. It was all good until the competitive streak kicked in, which in estate agents is really strong. I kicked some ass, drove really well, but alas, did not win. Two of our photographers were in a team with my boss. both of whom are S'Affers. They won. Bastards.

Anyway, after a brutal day driving, i raced over to the drinks venue where i changed in the bathrooms and began quaffing cheap red wine. I'm thinking i drank about two bottles alone! I chatted and flirted and generally had a good time meeting the faces behind the emails. But, as the thing with wine, it suddenly hit me and i was bundled into a cab and went home.

This morning i overslept and crawled into the office around lunchtime. But i think i deserved the lie in. I worked my ass off and it was an all round success. Now my boss wants me to do this twice a year! Bleh!
Now the hard work starts. I have three marketing plans to do on top of all my other work and my brain just isn't co operating today. And tonight after work, i'm going for an interview for a second job as my first hardly pays. Wish me luck!

On other matters. I was reading a few magazines that listed thier top albums for the year. Pray do tell, why is The Fratellis not on the list?? It is one of the kick ass albums of the year! Way better than say, The Automatic. Wait, wasn't I going to compile my top fifty albums? granted I haven't even listened to 80% of my list, so i'll give you the list next year.

Now to find more pain killers. Not just for the hangover, but also for the sore shoulder blades, the bruised leg (steering coloum induced) as well as my ice skating injury. Yep, I'm a walking bruise. OW!

Tuesday, 12 December 2006

It never drizzles

Yesterdays dream of going home early due to spending night at office was dashed to shreds as I ended up staying until well after 7pm running around doing the final arrangements to our huge event today.
This could have been fine, if i didn't recieve a call at 5:30pm from P. He is waiting for me at Paddington Station. He finally moved out of his ex-girlfriend's place in Bath and wanted to know when I was coming to pick him up.
Cool your heels, I'm at work. I'll be there when I can. I said, slightly hysterical, visions of my living room still full of drying laundry and the chaos that was my room after unpacking my suitcase from my trip home. That and the ever growing list of things to do before I leave.

I finally met him at 8:30 at Paddington station and we finally got home at 10:30pm. I was exhausted and still had to shower, tidy up and help him settle. Luckily for me, P is one of my good friends and has seen me in the most precarious of situations, so the fact that I had some of my nicest bras hanging up next to my ugliest bras didn't bother him.

In all honesty, P and I co habit quite well together. I don't know why, but we seem to work well like that. Now to find him a job.

So I overslept this morning, raced into teh office and in the next half hour must drag myself across town to go to this event! Wish me luck.

Monday, 11 December 2006

Friends and Opinions

During my recent jaunt back home, i was feeling a little philosophical and psychological. You see, during my extremely long, ardous, red wine addled, day flight of 13 hours, I sat and examined all the friends i've had over the course of my life. I also sat and analysed the type of person i am and how people percieve me.

Anyway, so i landed and met up with my friends and during my visit, on quiet moments would ask them: Why are you my friend?
This was usually met with a weary glance.
Just humour me, please.
The answers I got were mostly in the area of:
Because you're the coolest chick i've met.
You're fun to go out with.
You're entertaining.
You're sweet and nice and sugar and spice.
Because our paths keep crossing. (don't ask)

Its funny that i got these replies. I was expecting answers like:
Cos you're reliable and trustworthy and smart etc.

But then it hit me. I'm usually the last person my friends call if they're in trouble. And I have no idea why! I always say they can call me if the shit hits the fan, yet, it never seems to happen, cos i never get the call. I've never given them any reason to think i'm unreliable. Bloody hell! If one of them calls me from the border saying they've been arrested for smuggling or something, i'd be the first one in the car racing to bail them out. But even on a small scale. need a lift? call me! need cheering up? call me! hell, need to vent and fume, call me!!!

Maybe i have this all screwed around. Maybe being the good time friend is better than being the agony aunt.

Dusting off the CV

So I'm job hunting.
Again.

I hate job hunting. Especially when I have a pretty cool job as it is. The problem comes in where my pay is just short of pitiful. You have to worry when you're not earning eniugh to cover your transport to work, never mind rent and debt and oh, yes, groceries.

So I am job hunting for a part time job. I quit my last one before i went on leave cos the people were just awful! and the money really not worth it!

Anyone out there know of a pretty well paying part time job that i can do between the hours of 7pm and 1am mon to fri and all day on weekends? Really, I have no life, so working willnot be a problem!

Let me search Gumtree again.

Office Furniture

I have just sealed my fate as a workaholic.

Came into the office to get a head start on next weeks chaos and before i knew it, i missed the last train home! Its now 2am and am sitting at my desk too tired to keep working, but too wired to sleep.

Good thing i have music to keep me company.

Maybe I should start working on those Marketing Plans my boss asked for?
Really wish i had a blankie with me. Very cold, even with the heat turned up.

Sunday, 10 December 2006

Ok, looks like little sister Lollipop has tagged me to reveal five things blogworld doesn't know about me. hmmm.....

1) I have the memory retention of a goldfish.
2) Until recently I had a very pathetic crush on someone. I'm over it now.
3) I miss singing along to songs while driving in my car
4) I alphabetise my cd/dvd/book collection.
5) I have the entire Terry Pratchett collection in pdf format on my computer.

Right, thats me revealed.

This past week back home was good. Dunno why Lollipop is bitching about lack of sleep, I hardly slept at all!
But, I was able to somewhat quell the voices in my head. They are now back to normal, not screaming and pushing. Maybe i should explain - I have a voice for each part of me. There's the liberal hippy, the corporate bitch, the 'Bridget Jones', the writer, the Virgo and the baby.

A typical conversation would run something like this:

The scene - I'm sitting on the train, reading NME on the way to work.
The Writer (W) - Man, I wish I could sit and write articles about music all day. I'm way better than these guys. They didn't even put The Fratellis in the top 50 albums!?!
The Corporate Bitch (CB) - Those poor journos don't earn much. Once I get this career going i'll be earning so much i don't have to worry about writing all day. Hmmm, The Kooks hit platinum status.
Briget Jones (BJ) - Oh, but that Gerard Way is hot. hmmm, so too is the guy two rows ahead of me. yummy. he probably has a girlfriend or he's gay.
CB: why are you worrying about whether he has a girlfriend. you've got work to do.
The Virgo (V) - First thing is to label all my files, then do my filing. Also need to organise my drawers at home. really should repack the book shelf and give it a good dusting. didn't i read somewhere that train seats are...ewwww
The Baby (B) - i want my bed. some hot chocolate.
BJ: A sugar daddy wouldn't be too bad either.
LH: Maybe I should just quit and go work in Switzerland as a ski instructor or move to China and study bee keeping.
CB: You'll earn far less money. And it snows.
BJ: And you don't know how to ski.
W: My Chemical Romance is only in 10th place?
BJ: But what a nice piccie of Gerard. that guy over there looks like Gerard.
V: ergh! Must disinfect hands once i get to the office.
W: wow, i have abrilliant idea for a story. once upon a time...
B: Bed, warmth, now.

So you get the idea.

this carries on all day and by the tien i went away, they were screaming at me!! But ten days and copious litres of wine later, i have quietened them. Wonder how long it will last.

The Holiday Update

Insano is back in the land of Broadband, rain, cold and apparently, tornadoes. That's right. While I was soaking up hot, humid S'Affer sun, London was hit by a real tornado! So I'm guessing its the new Kansas. hahahaha...oh forget it!

My brief holiday, in case you're even remotely interested, was on the whole pretty good. Didn't get to work on my tan, nor did i get to the beach. I did, however, keep a constant red wine induced fuzziness going the whole time I was there. I am currently awaiting my liver's resignation letter. I even manage (barely) to get some work done. Yes, I know, its not a holiday if you have to work, but let's just say my timing is not the best in the world. I am so glad to be back, though, i kissed our office wireless router as i came into the office this evening.

Spent a lot of time with my mom, hence forth to be known as Hot Momma. This is due to a unanimous decision reached at the Rabbit, that my mom was pretty hot - for a mom that is. Also hung out with The Boys.
Went ice skating on Thursday at Festival Mall. Was on such a roll until I fumbled, lost my balance and ploughed head first into the plastic barrier. Stuffed up my right knee, bashed my left arm and am sporting a rather fetching bump on my forehead. oh, yes and am mildly concussed. I totally rock!
Afterwards, I stayed on the sidelines taking photos. I prefer to have the ice rink to myself anyway.

Equal parts red wine and arnica oil got my through the night as well as a healthy dose of spasmed and neurofen. Gotta love pharmacuticals.
Also, inadvertantly, caused Cigar (one of The Boys) to be chosen to lead the conga line at Ramps to teh Locomotion. He wants to greet me by putting both arms up in the air - I take no responsibility for the timing.
Also crashed my dad's very sober reception by making a side trip and rocking up with a few bottle of champers - the ones you can drink with a straw. The expressions were priceless. Oh, and the bride had a mullet! short and teased on top with little ringlets along the bottom. EUGH!

On my flight back to London, my handbag was poulled aside by the Amsterdam Security. They had spotted a suspicious shape in my bag. As the pried and prodded, I pulled out a small gift wrapped item.
AS: Please open the package.
II: Why?
AS: Just please open it.
II: (Contemplates arguing, but scenes of pending strip search changes her mind)
I unwrapped the gift from my dad. It was a ceramic candle holder. The AS, who had moments earlier being whistling the theme tune to some western movie, swallowed his tune and allowed me on my way. I wonder what colour he would have turned had he done a more thorough search of my bag?
I never want to fly again!

Later...
So i'm on the plane ready for take off when we get told to get off as a security check had not been completed! Ten minutes later we were back on board and ready to leave. I really hate flying!

So here i am, a Sunday night, sitting in the office, trying to catch up the mountain of work that somehow piled up while i was away!

Did I get tagged for anything?

Friday, 01 December 2006

Dial up Hell



Hello All,




You may have noticed i didn't blog for two days straight (new record for me). Anyways... the reason for my absence is - I'm home! I surprised everyone here on Wednesday night when i landed at Oliver Thambo Int (sic) and went to go visit my mom at her office. She nearly collapsed! It was brilliant!


The reason for my little trip is a) I had leave and had to take it or lose it. b) My dad is gettign married tomorrow (again). So i thought, let me hop on down to SA and see all my mates and some of my family before jetting back to freezing cold, hellishly bleak England for xmas.


But SA has some set backs - home still only has dial up internet, and i'm really spoilt with wireless broadband. but here i am, blogging away.




This is a little message to all you MAC users, esp Kevin, who spent yesterday at a conference telling everyone how cool MAC is:




Cheers from Holiday Girl!

Tuesday, 28 November 2006

Business as usual...

Business as usual…

So I’m doing my daily morning read of various blogs, realising that compared to most, I lead a rather boring life. I go to work, go home, surf the internet, gossip with Nats about the day’s events, then go sleep. Very boring indeed…

And it isn’t my fault really. I blame my payroll. I have far too much life for the amount I earn. Well, that and credit card debt. But you gotta love the credit card!!

I know I wasn’t tagged to do a dinner party line up, but you know what..i’ve never been one to wait my turn.

For my dinner party, the guests would be:

Katherine Hepburn (actress and womans rights activist)
Audrey Hepburn (actress and UN ambassador)
Tim Burton (director)
Winston Churchill (politian)
Pablo Fransisco (comedian)
John Peel (DJ)
Janet Evanovich (brilliant writer)
Prince William (future monarch)
John D Negroponte (head of the CIA)
Joss Whedon (creator of Buffy/Angel/Firefly)

To serve them I would have:

Mugabe (he deserves servitude)
The Monty Python team (just for the laughs)
The North Korean Dictator
Stalin
Zuma (he deserves servitude too)

Topics of discussion:

Zuma’s trials
Secrets of the CIA
Joss Whedon’s mind
Tim Burtons mind
Evolution of music from 1970 til today
How to achieve world peace.
The advantages to smoking cigars and drinking heavily.
Monarchy vs anarchy.

Playlist for the evening:

Norah Jones (chilled jazzy background music)
Katie Melua
Ella Fitgerald
Josh Groban
Mr Bungle
The Infected Mushrooms
White Stripes (acoustic sets)
Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly.
The Bang.

Don’t even ask about the menu. I’d serve them all good S’Affer food such as bobotie, my mom’s butternut soup, and for dessert – milktart. All with generous glasses of Drosty hof extra light red and amarula cream on ice to end the evening.

Looks like it’ll be an awesome evening.

Monday, 27 November 2006

Kelpto Art

My weekend was rather mundane. I spent Saturday chilling at home, doing copious amounts of laundry before heading out to Camden Market to do some serious window shopping. I came back empty handed (yay me) but also disappointed. You see, this cd shop Fopp is hosting the Fratellis tomorrow night at 6pm. I have two small problems with this.
Firstly, I work until 6pm on the other side of the city and will only get there at 8pm and secondly, even if I were to get there in time, I really don’t fancy getting pulverised by some overzealous 15 year old girl with enough piercings to set off a metal detector.
I spent the night watching Buffy until Nats came over and we chilled listening to music and drinking wine and talking a load of shit really.

Sunday was rainy – again, but this time Nats took me to an arts centre in Hampstead Heath.

Now, I’m all for arts and crafts and stuff, but sometimes I have to wonder how some of these artists get away with the absolute rubbish they try to sell! For example, a certain artist had an exhibition that was a video of her watching The Wizard of Oz while painting strange squiggly things on her wall. Erm..I did that as a three year old.
Another artist would dip twigs and leaves into porcelain…creepy. I’m the kind of person that takes about five seconds to make up my mind if I like a piece of art or not, so most of the visit was spent sticking my head in a door and if the phrase ‘I don’t get it’ surfaced, I moved on.
To give credit, there were some really good artists there amongst the pretentious patrons.

So Nats and I are ready to leave when we walk past a stack of pottery clay. A light bulb lit up above my head.
II: Nats, I want some pottery clay.
Nats: Ok, I’ll stand guard. You grab it and then we run.
II: Ok.

SO I grab a bag and nearly fell on the ground. The mofo was damn heavy, so I heaved it up and under my jacket and we skulked out a side door and up the road and around the corner. We were laughing so hard, we could barely walk. As we’re trekking to the station, the ten plus kilograms on my shoulder are making me reconsider my idea. What was I going to do with ten kilograms of pottery clay anyway? Its not like I had a potters wheel or Patrick Swayze or anything like that.

When I got home, I called my mom.
II: Mom,
Mom: yes love,
II: Mom, I’ve been arrested.
Mom: What! What did you do?
II: (Can’t contain laughter, splutters into phone)
Mom: You bloody brat! Giving me heart failure.
II: Sorry, I just…hahahahahahahaha…its just too..hahahahaha
Mom: Brat! What did you do?
II: There was pottery clay involved.
Mom: talk to your cousin.

This morning I got an email and was able to coherently explain my exploit. It was really funny at the time. But now, my mom’s reaction was funnier. Almost int eh vein of April Margera in Viva La Bam.

So last night I chilled, with my pottery clay and we watched Buffy. I’ve now finished season 4 – Season 5 is up next. More spills than thrills. But now I need to get my hands on the Angel series. I’m willing to swap my Supernatural season 1 box set for it!

Lolly went white water rafting this past weekend. I’ll let her tell you the story.

Friday, 24 November 2006

First posting of the day...and its far too bright

Typical of me to start my new blog with a post about being hungover...

My biggest fear has been confirmed - I'm sober! i'm not a dry drunk or a wet drunk or a drunk drunk. My liver has healed the wounds i inflicted on it back home and now i am paying for my soberness. or is it my brokeness that caused the soberness?

Anyway...

I'm not much of a hypochondriac, so hear me out on this.
For the past few weeks, my torso/chest area has been sore. I can't see why it should be cos i haven't really been doing anything to inflict pain. and its not a specific type of pain. its more like i've been put through a pizza dough roller machine a few times. Every fibre hurts. It even hurts to breath, to stay still, to move, to do anything really.

So last night we had the farewell drinks for one of our photographers. She is moving to New Zealand. I got there pretty late due to being on a bus for 45 minutes and then the tube for another 15 minutes. So i really needed a drink. I ordered my Strongbow (bad idea number 1) hoping th ealcohol would numb the pain that was encasing my body. I really felt like i had been through a scrum with the all black rugby team. yes i was really in a lot of inexplicable pain.

Moving on...

I drank my drink and began to chat to my colleagues and joke etc etc. then i discovered that the bathrooms were downstairs. Who the hell puts pub bathrooms in a place that requires stair access?????

The rest of the night is a blur of me drinking, fallin ginto cab, overpaying cab, falling out of cab, throwin gmy lighter at Nats window, getting fed by her, and going to bed. then i overslept this morning and skulked into the office an hour late!

And i'm still sore!! its not heart attack pains, its not collapsed lung pain, its just this constant all over bruising pain.

i'm going to go drink a box of Neurofen and try to get through the rest of my day...

Tube Issues

Dear Suicidal Fuckwit,

The next time you have the urge to end your pathetic existence, rather throw yourself off the Millennium Bridge and not infront of a train. Your little act of self destruction fucks up the tubes, messing up everyone else’s day and robs them of the opportunity to beat the crap out of you as you’re in a hundred pieces along the third track.

If you really need to off yourself, then do it in the privacy of your own home and not during rush hour on the freaking Piccadilly Line.

Thank you,

Pissed-off-and-late-because-of-you Insano.